I HATE food allergies… It’s true I said it. I hate having to always worry if I have the Benadryl around… and of course the EPI pens. (Which I am so eternally thankful we’ve never had to use). I hate going to a restaurant and not being able to just order without a lengthy explanation to the waiter or waitress. I hate that almost every time it comes wrong and I can tell there is butter on the broccoli and we have to send it back. I hate assuming the worst when we eat out thinking there is a chance she will wind up needing Benadryl. I hate that at Pre-k I can’t always make my daughters snack identical to all the other kids and she has to feel different (not that she seems to care yet but I know one day she will and I will have to dry her tears). I hate that when we go to play dates I have to be the weird mom requesting strangers half bathe their children after eating a snack. I hate that lots of people don’t get it and just think we’re weird and picky. I hate that I went against my mom instinct on a “may contain milk” label tonight and she reacted and now she can’t have the dessert we made together that she was so excited about and had to have Benadryl instead (Not worry I did my best to make it up to her with allergen free ice cream but it was still so sad). I hate that I won’t sleep well tonight and may feel the need to put her in our bed because what if the reaction comes back. I HATE food allergies with everything I have.
BUT I LOVE my daughter more than life itself and I would do absolutely anything to make sure she gets to feel as normal as she can and stay healthy. I will stay awake all night and watch her breathe if that’s what it takes to be sure I’m keeping her safe. When she wants a dessert or a food she sees on one of the baking videos she loves to watch so much, you bet I will research for hours if that’s what it takes until I can make something as close as humanly possible to what she wanted to make or have and we will make it. (She may just grow up to be the best dang egg, dairy, nut, and avocado free chef there ever was! Look out for her restaurant “Pickles” in about 18 years or so haha) its so hard being a mom of a child with food allergies. Unless you live it you just don’t really understand it. Allergies are very much an invisible problem… until they aren’t and your kid is covered in hives and scratching like crazy or even worse struggling to breathe. I just needed to vent today. Tomorrow I will put on my big girl pants again and I will redo the special dessert with 100% guaranteed safe chocolate that doesn’t have a “may contain” disclaimer and all will be right with the world, even if its just for a few minutes wile I get to watch my daughter enjoy her dessert without fear of a reaction.
****Stephanie is a 26 year old mom to a 4 year old who has multiple food allergies. It used to be 12+ but they’re down to 6 (and may get to challenge out of two). It’s been hard but they’ve made it work. Stephanie also have allergies to fish and Brazil nuts so she knew a little bit about being careful, but it’s hard having some of the main things they used to eat be dangerous now.